A Change In My Heart

     Hey it's me again! Here's a bit of a summary about what's been going on in my life and in my heart. 
     This summer has been a busy yet very memorable one. In June our partners and dear friends, the Hansons, left Grace Children's Home to follow God's call to Calvary Chapel Rosarito. My family moved back to the house above the nursery (where we were a year ago). The founder of Grace Children's Home, Martin Castro, moved his family into the house we were in. After getting situated into our new/old home, we jumped straight into a fun-filled summer with the kids. Our days were spent at the beach, pool, park, amusement park, laser tag and rollerskating rink. Every evening involved loud music, dancing, soccer, and bonfires. So many wonderful memories were made. Spending so much time with the kids was definitely a huge blessing and it knit us together more and more as a family in Christ. 
     As my relationships with these kids grow, I have started to feel a tug on my heart. Why is it fair that I get to go sleep in my own house, in my own room, in my own bed at night? Why is it fair that I get to watch TV in my own house? Why is it fair that I get to have parents and call them, "Mom", and, "Dad"? The answer is, it's NOT! As I grow closer and closer to the kids, I begin to realize that their life situation isn't fair! They don't deserve to be in a group home. They deserve a mom and a dad who will someday be Grandma and Grandpa to their kids. Over time God has been working on my heart and molding it to His own. The more I spend time with and grow closer to the kids, the more I want to stand up for them and make sure they get everything they deserve. Granted, because of their past they can be difficult or hard to get along with sometimes, but it only makes my love towards them grow stronger. 
     One of my best friends in the whole world lives at Grace Children's Home. It breaks my heart to remember the fact that she isn't with her parents. It breaks my heart when I invite her over to my house that she can't return the kindness and invite me over to her house. It breaks my heart that her parents aren't going to be at her high school graduation. It isn't fair! Up until recently, I had never felt the love, compassion, and devotion my parents had for the work God called us to do. Really, it wasn't until this summer that I truly felt God's heart for the fatherless.

     Heading into my senior year of high school, people keep asking me what I want to do after I graduate. Up to this point, the question has kind of stressed me out because I have had no idea what I want to be/do in my future. But after this summer, the Lord has given me some clarity that my future will most certainly involve working with and serving the fatherless. It gives me comfort to know that God is planning out how my future will look and where it will be. Please pray for me as I continue to seek guidance from our Father in Heaven. 

Valeria and Me

Rollerskating over summer break 

What does God really want from me?

     This fall I am a junior in High School. A lot has happened in my life since the last time I posted a blog. First of all, I turned 16! I had a nice party with family and friends. I managed to pass my driving test, and am now officially a licensed driver. For the past month, I have been living at my grandparents’ lovely cabin in Aspendell, California with my brother, Sam. I have really been enjoying my vacation time with friends and family.
    While Sam and I have been up here with my grandparents, some pretty big changes have been happening at home. My dad has been appointed, Director of Orphan Care, for YUGO Ministries. This means that now he is not only director of the nursery, but of the girls’ and boys’ homes as well. With this new role, my family has moved into the third floor home on the other side of the street. Lily, Joe, Mom, and Dad have moved all of our stuff without Sam and me being there. It all seemed to happen so fast, and all while I have been away.
      I started thinking about how these changes will affect my life when I return. I am going to come home to a different house and lifestyle. No longer will I have to tiptoe around the house for fear of waking up sleeping babies. No longer will I hear crying babies through the monitors in our kitchen. Everything God has done, using my family, to make the nursery what it is today, will now be handed over to someone else. All of the sleepless nights my mom put in, all of the Sundays we sacrificed to take care of the babies, these things started racing through my mind. Honestly, my first thoughts were, “It’s not fair!” The more I thought about it, the more angry and upset I became.
     But then God reminded me of the message my dad has been giving all summer to teams that come down to work in Mexico. I have listened to it several times, so I think I can quickly summarize: When we feel a tug on our hearts to do more for God, what does that mean? Does more mean quantity? Does he want us to give 100$ instead of 50$? Does he want us to spend a month in Mexico serving instead of 1 week? It could mean that, but as my dad has been teaching, and I agree, that when God says he wants more from us, he means hard. I think that God calls us all to do more by doing hard - doing things that are physically hard, emotionally hard, and spiritually hard.
     I have come to a conclusion. In my life right now, doing hard means letting go and trusting God. Moving away from what I have been doing for the past three years, and trusting that God will take care of things. Yes, coming home to a different house will be hard. Yes, starting a different lifestyle will be hard. Yes, seeing somebody else do the job that I love and worked so hard at for 3 years will be hard. It’s what God has called me to do… hard. It’s what He calls all Christians to do. It’s what Jesus himself did for us on the cross.
     My heart aches for the fatherless. Several of them are some of my very best friends. I am thankful that God has allowed my family and me to continue working with them, even if it looks different. I trust that God is in control of this situation, and I trust that he is doing what’s best. James 1:12 says, “Blessed is the man who preservers under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love Him.” Please keep my family in your prayers as we shift into a new stage in our lives. God Bless.

Birthdays & Blowholes

     On Monday, July 8th, I turned 15. I didn't ask for very much, but the one thing I really wanted to do was go to Ensenada with my dad and visit La Bufadora. La Bufadora means "The Blowhole" in English. It's basically a cave, and when the ocean water gets pushed into it, it explodes through a hole in the top. The past three times I visited La Bufadora, we only watched it blow for a short while. Our group either wanted to get back or to go to the market to go shopping.

     My dad and I have a lot on common. Along with a shared love for God, loud hard music, technology, surfing, physics, and sleeping in, we are really the only ones who could enjoy just sitting there watching La Bufadora blow over and over again - all day long with no other agenda. So, a while ago I asked my dad if he would take me to Ensenada for my birthday so that we could just sit there and watch La Bufafora for as long as we wanted without being in a hurry to move on.

Enjoying the day at La Bufadora

     I packed a lunch for the two of us and we left our house early Tuesday morning for Ensenada. We sat for hours just watching La Bufadora blow. We timed it so that we would be there during high tide, and luckily for us there was a little bit of a south swell left over from a hurricane so it exploded pretty high. As we sat there and watched the Bufadora blow, we also did one of our other favorite things - people watch. Throughout the day several conversations were repeated by different sets of visitors. It was fun to just listen, make eye contact with my dad and smile, knowing he was thinking what I was thinking. Once we figured out the period time between sets, we left during the lull to buy some churros and potato chips, but hurried back to watch some more.

Driving around the EOC

     When we left the Bufadora we headed to the Ensenada Outreach Center (EOC) which was about 30 minutes from where we were. My dad fixed some computer problems, and then let me drive around the neighborhood for a little bit since all of the roads are dirt. After our short stop at the EOC, we started the 2 hour long drive home. It was a super fun day. On this birthday I am so thankful for God's awesome creations and a Dad who enjoys them like I do.

Freshman in High School - Check!

Yearbook Headshot

          Today I finished my freshman year of high school! If you didn’t know, I attend Calvary Chapel Online High School. My teacher is Mrs. Russell, and there are several others in my grade. When I look back on the whole year, I still can’t believe that I made it through. ​

Yearbook Hobby

          During the school year, I was the secretary of the Leadership Team. I guess you could say that the Leadership Team is kind of like Student Council. We had different committees such as teacher appreciation, welcoming committee, treasurers, and yearbook. The team started out great. We had people in all different committees, we had a president and vice president, a chaplain, and also a sergeant at arms. However, all of this only lasted until Christmas break. After break, there were only about 4 or 5 of us that came back. I was still the secretary, and we still had a president, but that was about it. Since there weren't very many of us, we had to drop all of the committees, and decide on one project to work on. 

Yearbook - My Classroom

          We decided to do the yearbook, since it would be a benefit to all of the students. I took the job of setting up an email account for students to send in their photos and organized them by category. Some of the categories we came up with were headshots, hobbies, classroom (a photo of students working at their computer), landmarks (since we have students all around the world, we though it would be cool to have pictures of where the students live), and leadership. I loved looking at everybody’s pictures and then being the one to organize them (I love organization). 

          The last couple weeks of school were kind of stressful, as we worked to put the book together. I had many ideas about how to organize our small group to work efficiently, such as assigning pages for people to work on, but our president had different ideas. Her ideas weren’t bad, they just took more time. Though it really bugged me to not have control, I learned many personal lessons through the process. 

        

Yearbook - Landmark (Mexico Sunset)

           In my experience with the leadership team, I learned to have patience when people weren’t doing things the way I wanted them to. I also learned to respect other people’s ideas and opinions, because sometimes they are better than my own. I learned self control when I closed my mouth and listened to others. I know that my experience wasn’t that big of a deal, but if I hadn’t gone through it, I wouldn’t have grown in respect, patience or self-control. These Fruits of the Spirit bring me closer to God. So if I hadn’t gone through it, I wouldn’t be as close to God as I am now. 

          Anyways, the yearbook was finished and it turned out great. I am so glad that we all stuck with it and finished it out. I do think I might run for president next year though;) 

          God has shown me so many different things over the school year. I am so glad that I had a Christian teacher and Christian classmates to talk to. Patience, respect, and self-control are only a few of the lessons I learned. Please pray for me as God shows me even more things over the next school year, and I will be praying for all of you as well. Colossians 3:12, “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.”

Maria & Daniela

     On September 14, two babies arrived at Grace Babies’ Home. Their names are Maria and Daniela, and they are both 8 months old.
     Daniela has a huge personality. She always wants to be the center of attention. If you stop looking at her, she screams and cries. I wonder if maybe she was just starved for attention, and now that she gets it she loves it. When she first came to us, she could not sit up by herself or stand on her legs and bounce. After the first two weeks she was here, she was doing both of these. She is also in a stage of copying our facial expressions and sounds that we make. You can see these in the pictures below. We are pretty close to getting her to say “uh-oh”.
     Maria was a little more behind than Daniela when she came to us. She was also sick. She had a very bad cold for the first week and a half. Her cold is gone and she now can sit up by herself for the most part, and entertains herself with the toys she grabs. Maria has more of a “there you are” verses a “here I am” personality. She doesn’t scream or cry like Daniela does when you put her down on the ground or stop looking at her. She is always content. She likes it when you lift and hold her up in the air. My dad is really good at doing this.
      Grace Babies’ Home is a two-story building with our house on the second floor and the home for babies is on the first floor. My mom and I have been sleeping downstairs with the babies since they arrived. We get up with them in the night (or hopefully the morning), change them, feed them, and then play with them until their morning nap. Even though I have to do school, I try to help out with them as often as I can during the day.
     Before these two babies arrived at GBH, I was feeling kind of depressed. I kept thinking about the fact that I didn’t really have any friends to hang out with and that I was not really doing anything besides school and swimming. My life seemed really uneventful. When Daniela and Maria arrived, I felt I had a job to do and that I was needed. It really feels good to be needed. Whenever I start to think about the friend situation, I realize that I don’t really have time to hang out right now. I have a job to do that God gave me. I think he brought Maria and Daniela at the perfect time.

First Week in High School

Last week was my first week doing online High School. I took the orientation class on the first day and then started my real schoolwork the next day. The classes I am taking are: Bible, Physical Science, English, Math, Health, and French. My teacher’s name is Mrs. Russell.

Every morning I have to log on and read a devotional. After I read the devotion I have to post a comment or respond to another student’s comment about the devotion. This is how they take attendance every day.

In all of my subjects I have a Discussion Forum. This is where all of the kids in my class post comments about a question. For example, in Physical Science one of the questions was, “When doing an investigation, if you made a mistake, what would you do?” All of the students post what they would do and can also respond to other student's posts. The format for discussion is much like the devotional.

We were recently asked to define Christianity in our Bible Discussion Forum. After reading everyone's lengthy definitions I was hesitant to answer, but this is what I wrote: “John 3:16 says, ‘For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whosoever believes in Him will not perish but have everlasting life.’ That only son is Jesus Christ. Christianity is believing in Jesus Christ and having a personal relationship with Him.”

My favorite part of this program is that I can work at my own pace. I am the kind of person who would rather finish it fast and get it over with, instead of waiting until that last minute to do it. Once a week I have a meeting with my teacher in an online classroom that works like a chat room. In the classroom we can hear each other talk, and even see each other if we choose to turn on the video. I can work fast and finish my school work whenever, as long as I finish before the meeting.

I am very thankful that I can do this online High School. I think it is going to be a good school year.

Funny Thoughts & Feelings

        I am always thinking of funny things. The other day I was wondering what would happen if our dirty, old, green minivan - Sally, met a bright, red Ferrari? What would they talk about? Would they discuss the different things they see while driving? Would they compare how different the conversations are that they hear from their passengers? Would they talk about the different roads they drive and things they see while on those roads? 
        Sally would probably tell the Ferrari that she lives in Mexico, but in her lifetime she has seen just about everything - the beach, the mountains, the desert, and the snow. Now the Ferrari would probably tell our minivan that the only places it’s ever been are expensive cities and neighborhoods. Then Sally would talk about all the music it plays, such as Jana Alyra or Rob Biagi. She has heard our family talks and arguments, and little kids screaming and crying. Sally would explain how she has basically raised our family, getting us from place to place. 
        The Ferrari would tell the minivan that it has listened to every type of music except the music the minivan has heard. The conversations the Ferrari has heard have always been business conversations or boring adult conversations. The Ferrari has no idea about families and the things that happen in them. He has no idea what life looks like from Mexican roads. He maybe starts to feel like he’s missing out. 
        Then I started to think what our shiny, new Honda Odyssey – Jazz, and our old, green minivan – Sally, talk about now (they are parked next to each other). Does Sally say, “You are going to love the Struttons!” Does she say, “Mexico is the best place to be!” I wonder if Jazz will even like it here, or will she miss her old family, the old roads, and her old life? Does Sally feel rejected by our family? Or does she understand she still has an important job – serving babies at Grace Babies’ Home. 
        When I think about all these silly car conversations, I remember my feelings when we visited an outdoor market while on vacation last weekend. I walked around all the little shops, but as I kept looking around at all the girls my age I felt like our old, green minivan on a highway of Ferraris. I knew that on the outside I didn’t look much different, but I could feel something different on the inside. We had a meeting spot where my dad was hanging out in case someone got lost. So after walking for a little bit, I went back to the meeting spot and hung out with my dad. I didn’t really have the nerve to tell him then the reason why I didn’t want to keep shopping. So when he asked, “Couldn’t find anything you can’t live without?” I shook my head and said, “Nope, not really”. 
        The Bible says that our home is in heaven and until we get there we are not going to feel like we belong. I don’t know about you guys, but I know that I really need to remember that. God put me here in Mexico for a reason, and I sure am glad He did!